Previously in my life, I grew up and lived as a christian, my every conception of the world was strongly connected to God. The process of becoming an adult began in a later stage than in the case of other youngsters. The secretly hidden questions about the world, God and reality have just evolved. Getting into a different cultural environment, I left to myself where I got to known my inhibitions and started to think freely. Characteristical changes, questioning my beliefs and the avoidance of the common lifetypes motivated me to find the answers. I study what realtionship with God means, how my morality changed, I try to figure out the source of my feelings through my images. I am searching those points which deformed my relation with God. I want to find out, how I can fit in my young, honest beliefs into my current stage of life.